On a Tree Top

Logline: The story of a man and woman who will try anything to have a baby even if it doesn’t completely make sense.

INT.  TREEHOUSE.-DAY

The treehouse is a marvelous display of craftsmanship. A few years old but holding up extremely well.

ADAM,33, and his daughter BETH,5, are inside painting flowers on the wall. Adam watches as his girl makes colorful smears.

                             BETH

              Daddy. Can we paint my room next?

                             ADAM

I thought you were going to Kim’s house.

                             BETH

No. Kim’s mommy just had a baby so her house smells.

Adam smiles.

                                BETH

              Daddy where do babies come from?

Adam stops smiling. He pauses than calmly answers.

                               ADAM

Empty bottles.

BETH

              Really?

                             ADAM

Yep. And you need a treehouse.

BETH

              You’re lying.

ADAM

Nope. Mommy and I couldn’t get it right at first…

INT. ADAM AND ZOOEY’S HOUSE.-6 YEARS EARLIER- DAY

Adam,28, is sitting on the couch plucking away at a guitar. ZOOEY, 25, a beautiful woman with very soft features enters carrying a brown paper bag.

When she enters Adam jumps up to greet her at the door.

                             ADAM

              So?

Zooey looks at him sadly but with a small smile on her face and shakes her head “no”.

                             ADAM

I never trusted Dr. Allpow he has the mustache of a vaudeville villain and you know it.

Zooey laughs a little and then grabs him by the hand.

                             ZOOEY

Actually he did say there was something we could do.

Zooey pulls a bottle of pills out of the brown bag. She hands him the bottle and he reads it.

                             ADAM

              Fertility pills…for me.

Adam gets a very sad look on his face. His body slumps as he reads. Zooey wraps her arms around him.

                             ZOOEY

I love you. This doesn’t mean anything.

                             ADAM

Of course not. It just means medical science and I will split up the cards on father’s day.

          ZOOEY

It doesn’t make you any less of man.

Adam turns away from her and looks out the window. He spots a big tree in the backyard.

                             ADAM

I’m going to build a treehouse.

                                                ZOOEY

What?

              ADAM

If we’re going to have babies than we’ll need a place to put them.

               ZOOEY

In a tree?

               ADAM

Let me do this. I’ll take the pills. I’ll give you a baby and a treehouse for that is what men do.

               ZOOEY

I know something else men do.

Zooey gives him a seductive smile and walks into the bedroom. He runs after her. There is the sound of a bottle of pills shaking.

EXT. BACKYARD- 1 MONTH LATER-DAY

ADAM is up in the tree building. The house is more than halfway done but is missing a wall. Zooey walks under the tree.

                             ZOOEY

Wow, you’re doing really good. Have you been up there all day?

          ADAM

Yep. I’m really determined and my ladder fell down four hours ago.

Zooey looks down and sees the ladder on the ground.

                             ADAM

It’s okay. I need to build a rope ladder anyway. What did Dr. Moustache say?

Zooey takes the bottle of pills out of her pocket and shakes it.

                             ZOOEY

              He says keep trying.

Adam hangs his head down.

                             ZOOEY

And that we should try multiple positions.

Adam raises his head. Zooey struts a little as she walks inside.

                             ADAM

              Man. I wish I had a ladder.

EXT. BACKYARD- 1 MONTH LATER-DAY

Adam is testing the rope ladder by climbing it a few times. Zooey comes out. He looks at her. She shakes her head “no”.

                             ADAM

It’s okay I still need to build the secret entrance. If you’re nice I’ll tell you where it is.

Zooey shakes the bottle of pills.

                             ADAM

I’m starting to get a pavlovian response to that sound.

He chases her inside.

EXT. BACKYARD-1 MONTH LATER-DAY

Zooey walks under the tree and looks up. Adam drops right next to her trough the secret entrance. Before he can say anything…

                             ZOOEY

              Still nothing.

                   (on the verge of tears)

Maybe we should stop. We could adopt or…

Adam holds her firmly. He looks her in the face and brushes the hair out of her eyes.

                             ADAM

It’s my fault. This still needs a message basket.

          ZOOEY

(Smiling)

Okay well that explains it.

EXT. BACKYARD-1 MONTH LATER-DAY

Adam is up the treehouse he looks out the window. Zooey is standing in the yard. She holds up the bottle of pills.

                                ZOOEY

               At least we can use the basket.

Adam forces a smile. Zooey places the pills in the basket and he pulls it up. He takes the bottle out and shakes it. He realizes that it’s empty. He opens it. Inside is a positive pregnancy test. He looks down at Zooey tears are streaming down her face.

                             ADAM

              Told you we needed the treehouse.

                             ZOOEY

              I love you, Dad.

                             ADAM

              I love you too, Mom.

INT.  TREEHOUSE.-PRESENT –DAY

                                ADAM

…and then nine months later you were born.

Beth is sitting cross legged listening to the story. She suddenly gets a big smile on her face.

                             ZOOEY

If I build a fort in my room can I have a baby?

                             ADAM

              Not until you’re forty.

He goes back to painting and smiles.

                             THE END